"We will be dynamically proactive in disseminating this exposition of grammatical methodology, composition and authorship to all generators of communications"

The words you WON'T see in Government press releases

Officials have been issued with an online style guide that tells them, for the first time, what unacceptable Whitehallese is.

‘Writing is an instrument for conveying ideas from one mind to another; the writer’s job is to make the reader apprehend his meaning readily and precisely.’ - Sir Ernest Gowers in The Complete Plain Words

The basic fault of present-day writing is a tendency to say what one has to say in as complicated a way as possible. Instead of being simple, terse and direct, it is stilted, long-winded and circumlocutory; instead of choosing the simple word it prefers the unusual, instead of the plain phrase the cliché. (Gowers, 1954)

After the second world war the Treasury invited Gowers to write a pamphlet on English usage for use in civil service training courses. Plain Words (1948) became an instant success, not only within the civil service, but internationally. It was followed by the ABC of Plain Words, and the two books were later combined to become The Complete Plain Words.

Practice makes perfect

Boris Johnson plays himself to a tee in an interview with The Sun:

"They should save their breath. Put their shoulders to the wheel, all hands to the mast, and all shoot from the same trench — to mix my metaphors."

That actually made me smile, briefly. On reflection, it would have been funnier if he had said "to mix my similes".

"Retail surge fans rate rise fear"

That's the beauty of the English language!

Every single word in that headline could be a verb or a noun. 'Fans' in turn could mean 'aficionado' or 'ventilator', of course...

It could mean:
a) "Fans of retail surges rate fear of rises" (rate = 'have a high opinion of');
b) "Surge fans available at retail outlets rate fear of rises"
c) "There is a fear that the rate of retail surge fans will rise"; or,
d) "The surge in retail [sales] fans the fear of a rise in [interest] rates" (the probably correct interpretation).