Tuesday, 6 August 2013

Satire copies satire

The Onion, 1 June 2005:

CHICAGO—Located in the Bucktown neighborhood, American Mini-Storage is one of Chicago's best-kept secrets, but don't expect it to stay that way for long. The self-storage facility houses what is arguably the nation's most impressive collection of personal items accumulated during periods of failure.

"There are 250 storage units here, and each one has a different pathetic story to tell," said Carlos Garcia, one of several client-relations managers at American Mini-Storage.

"They run the gamut—from libraries of unread college textbooks to abandoned bolts of canvas to half-restored antique chests of drawers. Each storage locker is like a window into a separate life of disappointment and inadequacy."

The Daily Mash, 1 August 2013:

ALL of Britain’s best stuff is in storage, according to a new survey...

Wayne Hayes said: “My quest to own every issue of Fantastic Four took me 11 years and spanned three continents. I still burn with the intense thrill of holding #52, the last one I needed and the first appearance of the Black Panther. Then I got a girlfriend. The comics went into storage, and my soul went with them.”

... Roy Hobbs, proprietor of BFG Storage in Swindon, said: “I store your hopes. I store your dreams. I take that part of yourself you can’t admit has died and keep it safely locked away so you don’t have to witness its decay. And all for £17.77 a week.”


Mark In Mayenne said...

Does one laugh or cry?

Mark Wadsworth said...

MIM, neither.

You merely pause for a moment to think about all the "stuff" which you have had stashed away for years with the firm intention of getting back into it when you have time/money/when the kids have left home etc.

James Higham said...

Wouldn't mind seeing that facility for real.