Meaningless statistics of the day

I do wonder why they bother compiling and publishing crap like this:

From the BBC:

Rates of drug use and drinking are continuing to fall among young teenagers, annual NHS figures show. The proportion of 8,000 11-to-15-year-olds surveyed who have never drunk alcohol rose slightly to 48% in 2008.

48%? Wot? Not even a glass of champagne at a wedding? So that's a big fat lie for a start.

However, those who do drink alcohol seem to be consuming more, the NHS Information Centre said. The survey also found that pupils are more likely to drink if they live with other drinkers and if their parents do not mind them drinking. It is the first time the annual questionnaire has looked at the relationship between teenage drinking and drinking habits of the rest of the household.

It's nice the way that the NHS are now asking children about their parents' drinking habits, isn't it?

Also from the BBC:

There has been a 3% increase in the use of Class A drugs in England and Wales, Home Office figures show. The British Crime Survey found almost four in every 100 people used a Class A drug in 2008-09 despite the overall use of illicit drugs remaining stable.

The survey found increases in use of cocaine, ecstasy, tranquilisers, anabolic steroids and ketamine. The long-term fall in drugs is partly down to a fall in the use of cannabis in England and Wales. According to the figures from the 2008-09 survey, almost 40% of people have used illegal drugs at some point - and about one in 10 had done so during the last year.

The use of all illegal drugs has been falling since 1996 but effectively stable over the last year...

All pretty dull so far, nothing to report. But hang about - what's this ...

But despite the long-term decline, almost four in 100 people used a Class A drug during the year, up 3% on the previous year. The rise confirms an underlying upward trend and supports a United Nation's analysis that the UK has the greatest number of Class A drug users in Europe.

So, despite these statistics being flaky at best, OT1H the use of drugs (to the extent that people 'fess up to it) is falling ever so slightly, but OTOH because people are doing less of one type and more of another, this confirms an underlying upward trend?* Rather disappointingly, the BBC don't include any rent-a-quotes from a fakecharity followed by a government spokesman saying that they will be responding to the fakecharity's concerns.

* A bit like the "seasonal fluctuations masking an underlying warming trend"?