Monday 15 July 2013

"World's oldest pornographic 'magazine' discovered in Scottish field"

From the BBC:

Arseologists believe they have discovered the world's oldest porn "magazine" under an Aberdeenshire hedge.

Excavations of a field at Crathes Castle found a series of low walls which appear to represent a large pair of breasts and a nice pair of legs when viewed from above. A team led by the University of Birmingham suggests the ancient monument was created by hunter-gatherers about 10,000 years ago. The stone outlines, at Warren Field, were first excavated in 2004.

The experts who analysed the image said they may have contained wooden posts as a crude indication of pubic hair. The Mesolithic "Page 3 Girl" is thousands of years older than previous known gratuitous objectification of women created in Mesopotamia.

The analysis has been published in the journal, Internet Arseology. The shadows cast by the stones align on the Midwinter sunrise, probably to remind married hunter-gatherers to get Her Indoors Inthecave something nice for the festive season, and provided single hunter-gatherers with an "anatomic reminder" of what to look for when out clubbing.

3 comments:

Woman on a Raft said...

Ahhh, I think that's sweet. The computers are looking for their mummies and daddies.

View from the Solent said...

MW leads, Mash follows
Daily Mash

Mark Wadsworth said...

WOAR, and they've found them.

VFTS, thanks, that's the second time I've managed to beat The Mash to the obvious punchline* in about three years of trying :-)

* To be fair, VIZ might have done a similar story ago, I vaguely remember.