From The Daily Mail:
A holidaymaker has told how he was blinded after a bird pecked out his eye in a horror attack on a beach.
Animal-lover Michael Buckland, 38, kindly tried to rescue the injured gannet when he spotted it struggling for life. But the terrified bird began pecking at his face - and punctured his right eyeball at least three times with its razor sharp six-inch beak in Gower, South Wales.
His left eyelid was sliced in two and his right eye dangled from his face following the frenzied attack. Now welder Michael has been told by doctors he will never be able to see again through his right eye - but his left eye has been saved...
Jesus H Christ, this isn't funny any more.
Male Talkers
2 hours ago
13 comments:
Nasty. He has my sympathy, but rescue or not, he wasn't going to get in the gannet's good books, was he? They're a bit lacking on the concept of getting greater benefit.
Many years ago while on an outdoors climbing / walking course we found a gannet on a remote Scottish beach; wing horribly broken, fishing line wrapped tight round one foot. No way was it going to live so we, ah, put it out of its misery.
Then plucked it, gutted it, and roasted it over a fire. Waste not, want not, as granny used to say....
It was completely disgusting. Lesson learned. Leave seabirds alone. Totally.
FT, good anecdotal. Meanwhile, there's a rat somewhere regaling the other rats with similar tales about other things which don't taxte nice.
I recall seeing a video clip of some stupid German bint who thought it a good idea to swim with polar bears in a zoo - after all they are lovely and fluffy and soon to be extinct. Surprise, surprise, she got a good slapping from some very large paws.
The "animals good, people bad" brigade have a lot to answer for. They brainwash the most gullible into believing creatures that kill and eat other animals offer no threat to animals in clothes.
If you are stupid enough to believe that you'll get no sympathy from me when your new friend is enjoying a tasty treat of fresh testicles.
I'm sorry for the chap - he was doing his best. but, there but fot the grace of God:
I spend much of my time reading - writers do - and I was upstairs the other day trying to do do some homework and became aware of a persistent noise from the garden. Well, finally I thought "Fuck this" so went down to investigate.
It was about 3.00 in the afternoon, so the last thing I expected to see was a large Barn Owl going nuts. They are generally nocturnal. She (I presume it was a she) was agitated a bit and seemed to be indicating a crisis, which I tracked down after a couple of minutes.
It was her kid, who had apparently crashed. There he was, (I assume it was a he) inverted, jammed into the 90 degree angle between the back wall and the ground. He was only about a foot long. She, on the other hand was too big to get in there and pick him up - he was stuck behind a bush.
Now I know that the big deal about birds is the danger of a broken neck, so you have to be careful. They are complicated structures (did you know that a sparrow has more bones in the neck than a giraffe?). So, I set to, which rapidly became a bit perilous as she took an instinctual dislike and started off on one. I can't blame her for that, but I learned, very rapidly, that you cannot negotiate with an owl. Not at all; they just don't do that. And I don't recommend being pecked on the arse by one, either.
All was well - I asked my daughter to grab a kitchen towel roll and made a kind of stretcher for the poor little chap - I called him Oswald - and put him right side up. He seemed fine, apart from being a bit dazed and confused. He pecked me too; ungrateful little sod, but quite qickly, he attempted to get airborne again, which seemed to calm his mother somewhat, as she stopped attacking me.
Which was all just as well, because twenty minutes later the fox which thinks he runs my garden (and which I have been trying to kill for years) came loping through - he would have nabbed Oswald without even breaking step. So I suppose that qualifies as a win/win...
TFB, that one was brilliant!
RE, that's very commendable of you, well done. But with the benefit of hindsight, would a three way fight between mummey owl, fox and baby owl not have been a most memorable spectacle?
Yes, it would, and the Libertarian in me would have sold tickets, but I am cursed with a sense of fairness.
Having said that, I nailed six squirrels over the weekend. The foxes and the owls may feast off them.
Give Oswald a 'second chance!' Now where have I heard that recently? I feel a T-shirt coming on.
I suppose I am interfering with the tooth and claw stuff, but sod it, it's my garden. And I prefer birds to foxes, despite that poor bloke's experience. DO. NOT. REASON. WITH. A. BIRD!
I'm still standing up as I type this. I doubt Oswald will remember. Bird Brain...
RE: "I am cursed with a sense of fairness. Having said that, I nailed six squirrels over the weekend."
Grey or black squirrels I hope, not the cute little 'native' red ones?
Well, Dead, really. Did you ever hear that Today programme thing about squirrels? Hysterical. They had some total arsehole complaining that the Red/Grey Squirrel issue was 'RACIST'.
At which point I decided that to listen to that programme was actually bad for my blood pressure.
So I started to listen to Nick Ferrari instead.
Grey. Six.(to my shame I entirely missed two). But that improves the odds for the songbirds and TWO pairs of Wrens which reside upon my modest acreage.
Fuck'em, frankly; plenty more where they came from...
RE, to be fair the red/grey thing is racist, so what? So are all people who campaign for or against any sort of wild life or plants anywhere in the world (see also: Aussies shooting camels). That makes it neither a bad thing nor a good thing, either certain species are worth protecting or they aren't.
BTW, what sort of weapon do you use? What sort of range? I'm intrigued now.
It's a .177 air rifle with as much stopping power as is legal. The pellets are plastic-sleeved (like a low-grade Sabot round) and they seem to work, and are humane-ish.
I've a competition going with the local Rector, per month, which has been known to upset the good ladies of the Mothers' Union (who all seem to be inveterate lefties. And this is Somerset, FFS!
I dislike doing it, but if I didn't, I know I'd have no wildlife in m'garden except fucking squirrels. And they do quite a lot of that. But I always wait until they've finished. Always leave them smiling...
@RE: good man. No grey squirrels here (island) but if there were I'd be shooting them too. We're just overrun with rabbits, but a bloody idle pair of Hen Harriers nesting nearby resolutely refuse to do their duty..........
It's a tricky balance, but surely, one of the reasons we walk upright is a sense of another balance.
Ferrets, much as I like them, are probably not the answer. Rabbit stew, however, might be...
Trouble is, I lack an air rifle and the 12 bore in the cupboard wouldn't leave enough rabbit to be any use.
The missus doesn't like the idea of snares... she's quite attached to the 6 or 8 rabbits in the front garden most evenings...
But when the zombie apocalypse dawns, or the banking system folds, we shalln't starve easily....
Sod the Hen Harriers. :-)
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