Hopefully, now the Lib-Cons are in charge, we'll be seeing a bit less of this sort of thing.
I would normally choose a couple of highlights for you, but I can't - the whole article is comedy gold, and I haven't even dared download the handbook itself.
Wednesday, 19 May 2010
"Staff Diversity Handbook"
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9 comments:
"Each member of staff has their own printed copy in a ring binders to allow easy updating. All staff were asked to sign to say that they had read and understood the contents of the handbook."
Aha! Do I spot a possible legal disclaimer, in the event of any cultural misunderstanding? 'Can't sue is, mate, we made 'em read the book!'
Better yet :
"During CHG’s reassessment for Investors in People accreditation, the Staff Diversity Handbook was singled out for praise. Katharine Simpson, an assessor at Investors in People Northwest said:
“The Staff Diversity Handbook is a fantastic resource with a wealth of information, tips and signposting to support understanding and an ethos of true diversity in the workplace and in the community...... It’s a document you would ‘want’ to read rather than ‘have’ to read.”
Tenant involvement : Tenants were not involved in developing the staff handbook.
Oh yes, an invaluable guide to dealing with your diverse customer group compiled with no reference at all to the "customer group" - I wonder why not - could it be they might say "rather than wasting money on this and creating a whole bureaucracy just for it, how about doing the things we want done and employing people to do that. Now that would be "diverse". You don't know whether to laugh or cry ..
"The directory and tenant census information will continue to be updated quarterly. The tenant census information section is likely to expand as staff have asked for the diversity information to be broken down by local authority area." Tenants are going to be obliged (no doubt) to provide even more information on even more forms just so staff can "tick off" the right "diversity awareness" boxes ... you might even develop a paranoia that "diversity awareness" was some sort of cover for "social engineering policy monitoring"
“The Staff Diversity Handbook is a fantastic resource with a wealth of information, tips and signposting to support understanding and an ethos of true diversity in the workplace and in the community...... It’s a document you would ‘want’ to read rather than ‘have’ to read.”
Mark, pass the paper bag please.
I should have added on my earlier comment that having been subjected to a lot of "diversity awareness" training I nevertheless blotted my copybook by suggesting "out loud" (tsk, tsk, you can think these things, but don't say them out loud)during one "open discussion" session during a DA seminar that "Diversity Awareness" was "coming to terms with the fact that people had different ideas, lifestyles, habits and prejudices to mine, and that the best way of showing I was a respecter of this diversity was to accept that because I was self evidently a WASP (funnily enough I'm not, I have quite a "diverse" bunch of antecedents, not that that matters) their ideas, lifetsyles habits and prejudices would always, for very very good reasons of course, trump mine, meaning my life would be so much easier if I kept any anti-diverse opinions and ideas I might harbour to myself". Well I quickly discovered that was indeed a useful maxim to observe if you don't want to become the pariah of the day on the dversity awareness seminar, that is for sure ...
Most people who migrate to this country do so because they admit (implicitly or explicitly) that our culture is superior to theirs. They certainly aren’t here for the weather. That is they are admitting that British education, health care (poor as they may be), plus our legal system, economic sytem, etc etc etc i.e. our culture is better than theirs. We therefore have NO OBLIGATION WHATEVER to make any concessions whatever to their cultures.
To advocate diversity in the abstract is the most moronic, anodyne, thick headed, piece of bullshit that ever appeared on face of planet Earth. Diversity per se is not inherently better than its opposite, purity.
JM, not really - what about staff with reading disabilies, who are blind or don't speak English as a first language?
Anon, it's the gift that keeps on giving!
JH, there's a pull-out paper bag right at the back.
M, I'm sorry but it's off to Re-Education Camp with you :(
Ah yes, Investors in People. I try wherever possible and on principle to avoid doing business with organisations holding the Investor in People badge. For me, they may as well put a little star with We Are Shite on their stationery.
The download is now password protected. Is it really that good?
bill
Bill
I have a feeling its so the rest of us can't have a cheap laugh at their expense.
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