Black Swan Event

From the BBC:

Call to Queen over 'Mr Asbo' swan in Cambridge

Rowers in Cambridge have called for the Queen to remove an aggressive swan nicknamed "Mr Asbo" which they claim attacks people using the river. The bird patrols a 1,600ft (488m) stretch of water near its nest in Fen Ditton, a spokesman from the Cambridgeshire Rowing Association said.

President Bill Key said the swan flaps its wings and pecks rowers and boats. Mr Key said the cox of his crew is afraid to go into the water because she was injured in an attack by the swan. The Cam Conservators said they have been in discussions about its removal.

Her Majesty's Warden of the Swans, Prof Chris Perrins, who works in the zoology department at Oxford University, said: "The Crown does not own this bird but it can claim it." He said it is essential that permission is sought from Her Majesty's Swan Marker, David Barber, who advises behalf of the Crown whether a claim for ownership will be made. If approval is given, a licence must be collected from Natural England.

Spotted by JuliaM.

Now, I enjoy a good animal attack story as much as the next man (or woman, obviously, in the case of JuliaM), but doesn't that look a bit like bureaucracy gone mad? The Cam Conservators discuss it with HM Warden of Swans who in turn seeks permission from HM Swan Marker to advise on behalf of The Crown and then to collect a licence from super-quango Natural England? No doubt the fakecharities RSPCA* and RSPB** will want to get their oar in as well.

Or not, as the case may be.

* I can't give you figures for the extent to which the RSPCA is taxpayer funded, because they are divided into 245 sub-charities, each of which publishes its own accounts, but it'll be in there somewhere - as a general rule, any 'charity' which can afford to advertise on the telly is a fakecharity.

** From Note 3, page 23 of the RSPB's 2009 accounts: they receive about £25 million a year (a third of their income) in grants from (deep breath): Landfill Communities Fund, Department for Environment, Food & Rural Affairs, Natural England (yes, them again), Scottish Natural Heritage, Environment Agency, South East of England Development Agency, Countryside Council for Wales, Department for International Development, Forestry Commission, Department of Environment (Northern Ireland), Scottish Executive, East of England Development Agency, National Assembly for Wales, East Midlands Development Agency, Department of Agriculture & Rural Development (Northern Ireland), the European Union, National Lottery Funds and Local councils.