Saturday 20 February 2010

"Fresh fish sold here daily"

A more cerebral colleague once told me the following joke:

A man sees a fishmonger admiring the new sign above his shop: "Fresh fish sold here daily".

"That's too many words" says the man.

"How do you work that out?" asks the shopkeeper.

"Well, you don't need the word 'here' because the sign is above your shop - where else are you going to sell them? You don't need the word 'daily' because you're hardly likely to advertise that you were selling them yesterday or will be selling them tomorrow. You don't need the word 'fresh' because nobody wants to buy fish that aren't fresh. And you don't need the word 'sold' because it's a shop in the middle of a parade of shops - of course you are selling them and not giving them away."

"Hmmm ... right" muses the fishmonger "so I can remove all the words apart from 'fish', is what you are trying to say?"

"You don't need the word 'fish' either, to be honest" concludes the man "I could smell them from a hundred yards away."


Just for fun, try applying the same logic to Labour's new campaign slogan A future fair for all.

9 comments:

bayard said...

Under NuLab, the fair will be one where you lose on the swings and the roundabouts.

Anonymous said...

The future Fair will be the same as the old one, hoers queers and comic singers, aka the Labour Party with Brown the Clown as the ringmaster.

Eats, shoots and leaves.

James Higham said...

I've just been commenting on that elsewhere. Er ... what's it meant to mean?

Anonymous said...

I think we can start from the premise that it is not Fair for All today.

Today, thirteen years after the bastards at Labour took over.

Basically they are ungrammatically telling us that they have failed and would like another 5 or so years to have a second, er third, err fourth go.

Ross said...

"A future fair for all"

Hasn't anyone else spotted the implicit racism of this statement? Brown is saying that in the future something unspecified will happen to the darker skinned people so that all those who remain will be fair.

Mark Wadsworth said...

B, unless you're a quangista.

Bugger, less of the homophobic remarks, please, unless directed specifically at Gordon Brown, in which case fair play. As to your second remark, their policies stink and we can smell them from a hundred yards away.

JH, that's the point, it boils down to absolutely nothing.

R, that would be "A future for all fair [people]", yet another BNP slogan they've nicked.

Anonymous said...

Queer is not homophobic, not from my day and that was in Scotland.

A Queer was just someone who was that, very odd, very queer; someone not to be close to for your own safety. This is my definition of Gordon Brown.

Lola said...

They just love the F word don't they? It's the same nonsense as 'picking winners'. "So which are the losers then?".

Fair? Fair for whom? So you mean you're going to take money away from me to give it to him?" "Yes". "So that's not fair on me then?".

Fair means what New Labour think is fair. Where's their monopoly of wisdom then?

Little totalitarian shits.

Physiocrat said...

Yes but where's the fun?