Monday, 9 November 2009

Which bloody century do these people live in?

From an email from Covent Garden, London:

When it comes to Christmas, we're keeping it old-school. From a giant Christmas tree and reindeer petting for the kids, to carol-singing choirs in full voice, a complimentary glass of mulled wine, festive goodies for foodies and much more. You can also win a fabulous family ski holiday....

Dude, WTF?

Haven't they heard of Winterval, modernity, diversity, Elfin Safety, protecting the rain forests, CRB checks for reindeer handlers, infectious diseases, noise pollution, entertainment licences, binge drinking, the obesity epidemic, co-operation not competition, alternative lifestyles, non-essential flights, the lack of snow due to MMGW..?

10 comments:

Mark Wadsworth said...

If you follow the link, it gets worse:

"Meanwhile, kids will ... settle down for a session of magical candlelit storytelling..."

More Elfin Safety and CRB checks, as well as Carbon Footprint.

"All this is sound tracked by a selection of traditional choirs ... who’ll be joining the dots between Christmas songs..."

Forcing our Christian monoculture down other people's throats, more like.

JuliaM said...

"Haven't they heard of ...alternative lifestyles.."

Well, 'reindeer petting' might not mean what you think it does...

Turing word: awaye

In a manger..? ;)

James Higham said...

Reindeer petting eh? Kinky.

Tim Almond said...

Ah you see, such rules only apply to the unrighteous. Proles (not likely to be in Covent Garden) can't have "Christmas" because they're basically mindless racist bigots, but nice middle-class people are fully culturally aware, and basically better, so not likely to be re-programmed by whatever they see or hear.

The hypocrisy of most greenies when it comes to flying is just staggering. They'll buy a few reusable bags to show how green they are, then fuck off to Australia on holiday (while pissing and moaning that someone on a moderate income can afford to fly to Spain occassionally).

Mark Wadsworth said...

JM, JH, you've lost me. Is that something rude.

OC, what about The Righteous complaining about M&S including a bottle of wine with their £10 meal deals? But I agree on non-essential flights, total hypocrisy on that front.

Captain Ranty said...

Yon candles pump out more carcinogens than cigarettes as well.

Has ASH been alerted?

CR.

Mark Wadsworth said...

CR, now you're talking. Get ASH on the 'phone sharpish!

Anonymous said...

According to the website "the reindeer petting enclosure" comes "complete with helpful elves" as well. I am feeling sick.

Mark Wadsworth said...

AdamC, so they are exploiting vertically challenged people as well? Disgusting.

banned said...

Whatever happened to Christingle ?