"Eat well cash for mothers-to-be"

Jesus Jumping H Jack Fucking Flash, with knobs on, frankly.

"Pregnant women will get about £200 paid into their bank account to spend on healthy food under a government initiative, the BBC has learned ... To get the payment, however, a woman would have to meet with a health professional for tips on pregnancy health and welfare advice"

So it's not just a ridiculous bung of £200, there'll be 'health professionals', cashing in £30,000 a year salary plus pension, bonus and overtime?

"A Royal College of Midwives spokesman said: 'We are seeing a real and worrying widening of the health inequality gap [what? what fucking gap you bitch?] so any move to improve the health and wellbeing of pregnant women and their unborn child* is a positive step ... Improving the health of women and children is the work of decades ...' "

The last time I looked, a pregnancy lasts about 9 months, add on a couple for luck, it's not fucking decades is it? A year would cover it, I think, you devious crack-whore.

* I think this should be 'children' plural, but I am quoting verbatim here.