"Teacher lied about involvement in killing spree to get day off"

From The Metro:

Derek McGlone once told his school he would be able to come into work as he was being held in custody after having shot and killed a dozen people in the cinema. He claimed to be at the police station using his one phone call and was heard shouting "No cell can hold me!" just before the line went dead.

After admitting the lie, the 42-year-old head of music, who played lead guitar on Led Zeppelin's 2008 reunion album, said he was "embarrassed and sorry" about his actions and insisted he still wanted to teach. McGlone appeared at a General Teaching Council Scotland hearing where the panel found his fitness to teach was impaired.

His other excuses for skipping days at work included telling a deputy head that he had to go to the airport to plant a bomb, despite being at home in Glasgow. He had also gone on drunken Facebook rants, threatening to kill other staff "in cold blood".

McGlone made false statements about his absence from Calderhead High School, North Lanarkshire, between June 2008 and May last year. He admitted three charges brought by the GTCS, including lying about being a senior Al Qaeda commander in the Syrian civil war.

On his return, he was excluded from the staff biscuit club for a year.