This comes under the heading of 'WTF?"

http://www.theguardian.com/politics/2014/jul/02/tony-blair-advise-egypt-president-sisi-economic-reform

You really couldn't make it up, could you.

This bit is good:

"The former political associate said that a bargain had been struck and added: "Tony Blair has become Sisi's éminence grise and is working on the economic plan that the UAE is paying for. For him, it combines both an existential battle against Islamism and mouth-watering business opportunities in return for the kind of persuasive advocacy he provided George Bush over Iraq.

But this bit gets better:

"It's a very lucrative business model," [I bet it is] the associate added, "but he shouldn't be doing it. He's putting himself in hock to a regime that imprisons journalists. He's digging a deeper and deeper hole for himself and everyone associated with him."

Thus, no doubt, bringing The Curse Of The Pharaohs upon herself...

From The Daily Mail:

While Miley Cyrus was proving she's just as provocative as ever in London, Katy Perry took to the stage in Belfast in far more bubble-gum fashion.

The singer launched her Prismatic World Tour at the Northern Irish capital's Odyssey Arena, Wednesday night, where she showcased an array of colourful costumes as she performed her greatest hits.

And clearly there was an Egyptian theme as she changed from a Cleopatra-like empress on horseback, to a pink feline in a jumpsuit.

But I can understand why she has resorted to lampooning dead cultures:

From New York Daily News:

Katy Perry opened the American Music Awards on Sunday night dressed as a geisha while belting out her latest single "Unconditionally."

Although the stage aesthetics and colorful attire were quite beautiful, Perry is being called racist for sexualizing a traditional Japanese female figure, who is paid to serve as a hostess and excels in the art of entertainment, reports The Huffington Post.

From The Independent:

In the latest 'racist music video' accusation, Katy Perry's "Dark Horse" has sparked an online petition demanding it be pulled from YouTube, with some Muslims claiming it is blasphemous.

More than 50,000 Muslims have pledged their support for the video to be removed because of an offending scene, which shows an Islamic necklace burned by lightning shot from Perry's fingers.

And probably the cat lovers will be screaming "A kitten is for life and not for decorating jumpsuits" or something.

"Egypt strife may last several centuries, warns Hague"

From The Daily Mail:

William Hague has warned that the turmoil in Egypt could continue for 'up to a millenium' as it emerged that the former dictator Hosni Mubarak is soon to be freed.

The Foreign Secretary branded the situation in Cairo "very bleak. As per usual" and said the drift towards civil war in most populated Arab nations was one of the greatest crises of the 21st century, just as it had been in the 20th century and 19th century and so on, going pretty much all the way back to AD 610.

Violence flared again yesterday with details of two new atrocities emerging. At least 24 policemen loyal to the military regime were gunned down execution-style by Islamist militants in the Sinai desert. So far, the ongoing state of civil and external wars in the region have led to tens of millions of fatalities in the past fourteen centuries, with no sign of letting up any time soon.

Further violence is likely when the disgraced dictator is released from prison by the military regime, which ousted the Islamist government of Mohammad Morsi elected in 2011. But you might as well say "further violence in the Middle East is likely on Monday 7th February 2033" or "there will probably be violent clashes in the Middle East on the day that your grand-daughter gets married".

Egypt's acting head of state called for unity and harmony: "We Arabs are all brothers and must learn to put our differences aside.

"Instead of killing each other, we must agree on a common enemy - like the Jews or the Americans or somebody else picked at random - and wage a losing war on him instead."

"Egypt swears at new interim leader"

From the BBC:

The top judge of Egypt's Constitutional Court, Adly Mahmud Mansour, has been officially appointed "Supreme Twat of The Arab Republic of Egypt" at a foul mouthed ceremony a day after the army ousted President Mohammed Morsi.

Mr Morsi, Egypt's first freely elected leader, is under house arrest after what he says was a military coup by that "jumped up little twat Mansour". The army said the new interim leader "is another one of those bastards we'll probably have to depose again in a year or so".

Protestors in Tahrir Square have hastily reworded their anti-Morsi banners to give Mansour a taste of just how unpopular the old shit will be will be in a few months' time.

Hardly surprising

From The Daily Mail:

Half a billion pounds of European taxpayers' money donated to Egypt to fight corruption has disappeared, according to a report by EU auditors.

The European Court of Auditors (ECA), which audits the accounts of EU institutions, found the money had 'failed to tackle' key human rights issues in the country. The Luxembourg based group also found the aid had not helped to improve the rights of women and minorities or fight corruption.

It looked at the past five years of EU aid to Egypt, which amounted to more than €1 billion.

The report paid particularly close attention to the 60 per cent of EU aid to Egypt - worth £500 million over five years - which is handed over to support its state budget. The auditors found that there was no trace of how that money had been spent.

Of course, what the ECA doesn't appear to be asking is whether the EU officials concerned actually wired the money to the Egyptian government in the first place or whether they just got their opposite numbers in Egypt to sign a receipt and then split the winnings between themselves.

Stone Mason: Egypt needs "Giza Necropolis" approach to economy

Egypt should replicate the success of Giza 2560BC by picking industrial "winners" and embarking on a Pyramid-level infrastructure spree, according to the leader of the Stone Mason's Union.

He said that the success of the construction of the tomb for the Pharoah to travel to the stars in the afterlife showed that targeted funding could work if directed at sections of the Egyptian economy. Speaking at the annual union conference in Memphis, he said the Pyramids proved the "market doesn't always deliver" and vindicated the state's role in the Egyptian economy.

"It's right to celebrate the Pyramids, but it's even more important to learn from them, for the central lessons of these 20 years – that private isn't always best and the market doesn't always deliver – surely need to shape future policy," he said.

"We can't muddle through with our trip to the afterlife – we need investment, planning and a Giza-style national crusade. We won't build up industrial strength unless we work out what we do best as a country, whether it's temples to Isis, Osiris or Horus"

He said the rest of the Egypt also needed a Giza-style infrastructure boost, not just in terms of burial  tombs, but also in new palaces.

Short List

Former Middle Eastern leaders in a coma.

"Egyptians vote in landmark presidential election"

From the BBC:

Egyptians are voting for their new dictator, 15 months after ousting Hosni Mubarak in the Arab Spring uprising. Fifty million people are eligible to vote, and large queues have formed at some polling stations in the mistaken assumption that people were queuing for food.

The military council which assumed presidential power in February 2011 has promised a fair vote and civilian rule, which is not binding on the duly elected despot. The election pits Islamists against Western lackeys and revolutionaries against Mubarak-era ministers.

But the BBC's Wyre Davies, in the second city of Alexandria, says that for many people the election is not about religious dogma or party politics, but about who can take their food from the table.

The frontrunners are:

* Ahmed Shafiq, a former commander of the air force and briefly commandant of a large concentration camp for political prisoners.

* Amr Moussa, who has served as foreign minister and head of the Egyptian secret police.

* Mohammed Mursi, who heads Muslim Brotherhood's Amputations and Female Genital Mutilations Party.

* Abdul Moneim Aboul Fotouh, former head of the Egyptian national bank and a large-scale property developer, who has acted as intermediary for many Western arms manufacturers.

Meet the new boss, same as the old boss

Heroic journeys of antiquity

From The Natural Navigator:

When trying to understand the role of the sun in ancient journeys, the sources become fewer and the journeys less well known. Herodotus writes about an exploratory voyage commissioned by the ancient Egyptian King Necho II in about 600 BC. Necho II reportedly prdered a Phoenician expedition to sail clockwise around Africa, starting at the Red Sea and returning to the mouth of the Nile.

They were gone for three years. Herotodus writes that the Phoenecians, upon returning from their epic expedition, reported that after sailing sought and then turning west, they found that the sun was on their right, the opposite direction to where they were used to seeing it or expecting it to be.

Contemporary astronomical science was simply not strong enough to fabricate such an accurate, fundamental and yet prosaic detail of where the sun would be after sailing past the Equator and heading into the southern hemisphere. It is is that leads many of today's historians to conclude that the journey must have taken place.

Hosni Mubarak

A bit of a shame really.

It looks like the Egyptian President is going to throw in the towel.

Up until now, I had lived in the vague hope that a former Israeli PM would make a comeback, and the current US President would get them to sign up some more Camp David Peace Accords.

UPDATE. According to the news, he has changed his mind and is hanging on. He got a barracking from the crowd and to prevent violence escalating, he has recalled the Army to their barracks.

Tide turning or King Canute?

From the BBC:

Female students wearing a full face veil will be barred from Syrian university campuses, the country's minister of higher education has said. Ghiyath Barakat was reported to have said that the practice ran counter to the academic values and traditions of Syrian universities...

In 2009, Egypt's then foremost Muslim cleric, Sheikh Mohammed Sayed Tantawi, barred female students from wearing the full-face veil at the al-Azhar University, Sunni Islam's centre of learning and scholarship. He also upset other Muslim scholars by saying French Muslims should obey any law that France might enact banning the veil.

Earlier this month, France's lower house of parliament overwhelmingly approved a bill that would ban wearing the Islamic full veil in public. It must be ratified by the Senate in September to become law. Belgium's lower house of parliament has also passed a bill to ban clothing that hides a person's identity in public places, although it does not specifically refer to full-face Islamic veils.

See also Italy.

NOW That's what I call commitment!

Apparently the Algerian football team lost 0-4 to the Egyptian team this evening, yada yada, but what impresses me is that three of the Algerian players were sent off.

If you're going to go down, you might as well go down fighting!

Victimhood Poker

From the BBC:

Israel has ... been building a controversial barrier in and around the occupied West Bank in recent years. It says it is needed to defend Israeli citizens from attacks by militants. Palestinians, however, consider it a land grab. In 2004, the International Court of Justice in The Hague issued an advisory ruling that the barrier was illegal and should be removed.

Egypt is meanwhile building an underground barrier along its border with Gaza to stem the smuggling of weapons through tunnels.

Is nobody else worried about this?

Regular readers will no doubt remember this incident of a week ago, when a cow in Australia managed to derail a train, although no humans were hurt. Not much of a result from the bovines' point of view, but not only are they learning fast, they appear to be able to communicate on an international basis. In today's Metro we read this:

A wayward water buffalo caused a train to crash, killing 18 people and wounding 39. The animal wandered on to the tracks south of Cairo when a train struck it on Saturday night. The packed first-class passenger train then ploughed through the wreckage at high speed...

Thanks to Pavlov's Cat for the email.

Economic illiterate of the day (2)

Q: The price of commodity X has trebled. Your country, a developing country, is one of the world's largest producers/exporters of that commodity. What do you do:

A: Encourage your farmers to make as much Commodity X as they can while the sun shines and to export as much as possible, boosting your country's balance of payments and enriching your country?

B: Prohibit exports?

Follow-up Q: You're the Prime Minister of a rich Western country, who wants to help the developing world. The price that those countries can charge for their exports trebles. Do you:

A: Point out that these price movements will increase the incomes of those developing countries relative to rich, Western countries, and obviate the need for aid payments?

B: Wring your hands and say that "the spiraling prices threaten to plunge millions back into poverty and reverse progress on alleviating misery in the developing world"? (hint: see first link above).

Follow-up, follow-up Q: You've studied Politics, Philosophy & Economics at a top British university, and you are hoping to become Prime Minister of a rich, Western country. Do you:

A: Remember that you came out worst in the previous round of this competition and point out that consumption and spending patterns will change to adapt to new price levels, crudely paraphrased thusly: claim that people in the West will need to eat less meat -- and consume, or waste, less food in general. (hint: see first link above)?